Having fear of the first date is something useless and it’s doesn’t make any sense. You don’t have nothing to lose: if everything goes right, you will have another date, maybe something more; if everything goes wrong, you will never see that person anymore and “next!”. The question now is: does the perfect first date exists?
It does…i really believe it. However we need to try to understand the word “perfect”. What does the word perfect mean? For me, the word perfect is everything that goes as it suppose to. If you build a straight wall with all the planned measeures, in the planned time and it’s able to support the plannes load, it’s a perfect wall; if, at the end of the month, the accounts add up, you have perfectly managed your money; if you reach the goal you planned on time, you did a perfect job. This is for me perfection.
So, for me the perfect first date is what allows you to reach the planned goal. The only question is to understand what’s the goal. If you are thinking of sex, you are an idiot! First because might be a healthy danger (have you ever hears something like clamidia?), second because one-night-stands are bad, third it’s just rude to see the other person as just a object for your personal pleasure to throw away, once it’s all over.
If, for you, the first date means to make your partner fall in love with you, you are also wrong. That’s my little question: How? What’s the plan to make that person falling in love with you? You barely know the name, how can you achieve something so big and deep in just few hours? The love at first sight doesn’t happen every time.
“So, what’s the meaning of the first date after all?” you might ask yourselves. This is the exactly the point. The first date is called it for a reason: it’s the first time you meet your crush. Maybe you have talked together through a computer or a smartphone and you have an idea in your head of how he or she might be. But it’s just an idea, a fantasy, nothing real. You have never met him or her before! This is the reason of the first date: checking if your idea was right or wrong. If your picture in fron of your eyes is exactly like the picture in your mind, it’s mission complete! Otherwise it was nice to meet him or her, but move on to the next on the list.
“How should i do that?” would be your next question. Have you ever heard of talking and having a conversation? Honestly, how can you know someone if you don’t talk with him or her? Meet you both in a nice and quite place, away from distraction and take time (no matter how much) for you, only for you two! Ask about job, dreams, passions, hobbies, family, food or any other argument and listen to the answers. Once the date is over, you can decide either to see him or her again or give up on him or her. There’s no crazy activities, too much people involved or any kind of possible distraction whatsoever. It’s only you and him/her.
Meet somewhere quite, take you time, talk and listen. Then decide. This is the perfect date!