All the couples, especially in the first week or months, there are some milestonesthe they go through, lke first date, the first kiss and when both say “i love you” to each other. Howevery, there’s another “first time”, maybe the most famous and wanted one: the first time together in bed. It’s always a moment of “worries”, lot of expectation and too many thoughts going on in both minds. Is this “first time” something incredibly important?
Yes and no. It depends from person to person, from couple to couple. However it’s pretty different how men and women think about the first time…or at least that’s what i thought. Then i realise that i was wrong.
In my opinion, it’s for both partner the first time important. I mean, it’s the first time where both get really intimate together…i mean literally: no clothes, no masks and there’s no way to hide yourself. For the first time you show the other who you really are. There are two bodies and two minds that will become once for one night (at least one hopes so). there’s no other moment in a relationship where so much barriers are broken and where love is stronger.
Anyway there’s one thing men and women are very different: they way they live the first time. Not before, not after, but during sex we have two completely different approach to it. Let’s start from a female part of the world.
Now, I don’t know anything about women, so everything i am going to say it’s actually a Hyphotesis. I think that women live sex much more freely than men. It’s not the same for every woman, i get that, bot a big part of the entire female universe lives sex much easier than men, because they know that they will be fine. Not because they have some kind of magic fluid, but because we are talking about men: once we see a naked woman with legs with open in front of our eyes, we lose the ability to think, because the blood is somewhere else. The craziest part is that it doesn’t matter the size or the forms or the woman’s body, men will react exactly the same. The only thing a woman has to do is just enjoy the moments and let emotions runs free in her mind.
For a man, on the contrary, it is a freaking nightmare. Men are like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Before the “first time” men feel ready to go and confident to be able to do a good work. We act cool because we feel cool inside us. More than that, we have a huge visually documentation of what do to in those moments. So, for us it’s like routine, something easy to do. As soon as we start to see the woman we love take one clothes after the other, we start to realise that maybe we are not so ready as we thought to be. And the pressure goes on, the fear of failure start to run in our mind, but it’s too late to get away. We are soldiers, so we have to fight…and the fight it way much harder than we expected. We don’t enjoy the first time: we try to survive long enough to make the woman happy. If you ask men all over the world, all of them have a strategy to last longer than a couple of minutes: some think about work, some think about a old and wrinkled woman and other they try not to think at all.
And when we men ask “did you like it?” it’s because we were so focused on not to finish too quickly than we don’t know what was going on.
That’s been said, the first time is horrible. Yes, it’s important because for the first time you can see and feel what you have only imagined, but the performance itself it’s horrible. Only few men are in the position to say “oh, i remember it well and it was long, intense and amazing!” In my opinion, all the following times can give you an idea of how the things between the two really are…but after the first time it’s just impossible for me to judge anything!