Funny Country Review #5: Italy

I am proud to be italian. I really am! I was born in the magnificent Milan and i lived there for the first 21 years of my life. I could not actually imagine my life being born in another country. In veins runs italian blood and i am happy and grateful fot that. However, Italy is a very complicated country and some italians try to screw the BEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD!

Italy could be easily the richest country in the world only with tourism. I’m not kidding. The enitre country is an open-air museum. Everywhere you look there’s some history: a small church, a small village somewhere, a tiny road or an hidden house. Everything in Italy has something to say. Cities like Rome, Venice, Naples, Florence, just to name a few, are the perfect examples: those cities doesn’t have only stories, but hundreds of thousands of novels…and all of them would be best-sellers! There are student, who study architecture in all the Universities all around the world, who come in Italy and spends weeks of their lives to see what we have to offer. Italy and Egypt have dominated the last 7000 years of art. No question about that…and nobody can’t say anything different!
You don’t like monuments? Well, we have heartbreaking landscapes. Bewteen the mountain (like Alps and dolomities), the seas (we have four different seas) and everthing inbetween (like hills, flat lads) the opportunity to get a wonderful vacation absorbed in the nature are actually countless.
Don’t you like think like culture and nature and you are a guy who just love to eat on vacation? Well, my friend, you are in the right place! We have the best food in the entire world. Countries in the world try to imitate and replicate it, without any kind of luck! Maybe is not the most famous or sponosored, but it’s by quite some margine the best food you can possibly eat in your entire life! I don’t say it because i am italian, but to be honest…bewteen a burger and a pizza made in Naples, what would you choose? We have EVERYTHING to offer, literally everything. The only thing ou have to do is take some time off, prepare your stomach and make yourself comfortable, because the yourney will be something special!

You don’t like any of these and you just want to make some shopping? Oh, Milan is the perfect place! There’s no better country to make a wild shopping absorbed by the italian vibes! You have italian fancy shops offering very fancy italian clothes (have you ever heard of brand like Versace, Dolce & Gabbana, Valentino, Armani?), bars where you can drink an espresso, restaurant where you can eat some tasty italian delicassy and the wonderful weather…i mean, what do you need more than that? The entire center on Milan is made to spend your money and be happy with it…and you have also monuments to see like “Il Duomo di Milano”, “La Scala”, “Corso Vittorio Emanuele”, “Il Castello Sforzesco” and much more other historical places. Milan is the perfect city where you get some historical knowledge and you can spend all your money!

Talking about money, Luxus is our thing. Marbles, interior design, fasr cars…we have all invented it. Other countries have just learned from us what is was and they created their offer. Mercedes is a nice car, but in comparison with a Ferrari? Do we really want to get in to this discussion? If you think about money and luxus, Italy is the place where everything was born.

It sound perfect, doesn’t it? Well, there’s one little problem: we don’t care about all of it at all. Or we sometimes forget the luck we have. Italian people live in the best country possible, but they think that United States, England or any other country in the world is better that Italy. I mean, are you kidding me? The entire world is freaking jealous that we have so much to offer and we just don’t care at all. We eat asian or arabic food instead of our food, we spend thousand of euros just to go to Los Angeles, because of the City, when people in LA come to us, because they know where the real good stuff really is.

If we are so much better than the other, why are we struggle so much? Because of a failing good marketing strategy. People in control have no idea how to promote our country. They say that we are “the best”, but they don’t do anything (or they don’t want to do anything) to actually make it real. What the leader and the ministers say, like a very boring broken record, is just a way to open their mouth and try to look cool, when in reality Italy is a country that italians don’t deserve. I often think that the italian population are the worst population to take care of what history gave to humanity.

I truly believe that Italy can be the new Dubai only with some few investment in tourism, preservation of everything we have right now, protection of our products and a working marketing strategy. Just those four things and you might see people in Italy driving on the street with Ferraris, Lamborghinis wearing very expencive and fancy fans!

See ya


The Ironically All-Rounder
I'm pretty sure to know everything. If thre's nothing i don't know. be free to tell me!

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