Gym: Why a does a Man goes there?

Men are simple beings. We all know that! They wake up, they spread rudeness and boorishness all day long, they lead the world as worst as the possibly can and they go to bed. The problem is that you can’t see these things on the sunlight, because men know how to hide the traces (humiliated and beaten women at home know that). However, there’s a way to witness the real men’s essence publicly. There’s only one place, one place only: in the Gym. In this place, MEN show their really nature. Why men go to the gym? And what are the goals they want to achieve?

Man and his body

As i previously said, men are simple being and, as simple beings, they have very simple needs. There’s only two reason why men go to the gym: getting as big as possible and celebrate it with the others.

There’s no need for him go get in shape. He doesn’t need a good body to have a chance for a good love life with a woman. No need to have a decent body to be accepted by others (like for a woman). More importantly, no problems of bodyshaming whatsoever. Men go to the gym with light heart. Their only problem is to make sure to become as big as The Rock. Not to forget, a man has to strut in front of other’s eye. Nothing more, nothing less.

Men in the Gym Get bigger and let’s celebrate it!

The more muscles a man can build, the better. It doesn’t matter if the man will look terrible or funny. He still wants and needs a huge body. The man can be extremely tall or extremely small, but the goal is still the same: arm, pectoral, abdominal, shoulder and back must be as big as Goku’s body. Once in the gym, he has to lift hundreds of kilos and then show the “results” to all the member of the crew, who will treat him as a divine being. It’s like a peacock that shows the tail….yeah, something like that. In the meantimes, women in the gym will look at him, thinking “Oh, look that guy! He looks so weird!”

As soon as the man has some muscle, the gym is not enough. The celebration must take place also outside. The entire world must celebrate his achievement. There’s only one problem. His muscles are too awesome, but he can’t walk outside shirtless. However, the urgent need to strut is still there. How to solve the problem? They do something very stupid: all the t-shirts must be smaller that they should be. Is is a comfortable thing? No, but we are missing the point here. It’s not about being comfortable, it’s about celebration. Everyone has to see all the muscles through the t-shirt everywhere he goes.

Getting Big in a weird way

You know what’s funny? The man spend lot of money in the gym, only for making huge only one half of his body: the upper side. A normal human being, once it gets to the gym, it should work on its body entirely. So a workout should be. But we are not talking about normal human beings: for the men in the gym, the lower part of the body is irrelevant. Legs is a huge waste of time.

How many times have you seen men with huge upper-bodies, but very little and skinny legs? It’s too funny to see how for those gentlemen is fine to look like a wrestler with chicken legs. Luckily for humanity, there are also smart men who work on the entire body, to look good from head to toe and they don’t show proudly what they have become, because they don’t need it!

Gym as a chicken fight

However, the gym for the rest of the men is not just a place to get in shape, it’s also an hunting territory. Every single man in there has to show to other guy who’s the bigger man and who’s the boss of the gym. It’s a non-written rule in every gym! It’s like a fight club, but instead to fight with fists and kicks, they fight with bad looks, too much sweat and rudeness. But not all of them are worthy to win the war for the territory.

The fight is hard and there’s only one winner: THE KING in every gym. The biggest guy of all with that proud look in the face that tells you “I’m the boss here, kid!”: Every tool belongs to him and as soon as he approaches it, and you are using it, you have to leave it immediately, because he has to sweat on it. It’s a question of delimiting the territory. All the other guy, once they smell that smell of “hard Work, pain and dedication”, know that that tool belongs to the king of the gym.

It’s all about testosterone. The more you have, the bigger you get and the throne is every day closer.
For men is not only a fitness center: it’s a fight for the proud and to make sure to conquer the most beautiful ladies in the cities…girls who too often are conquered by, the so called “Alpha Man”, the real boss in town!

See ya

Mauro.

The Ironically All-Rounder
I'm pretty sure to know everything. If thre's nothing i don't know. be free to tell me!

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